"( in my armchair pysch view.) its a fantasy of "I'm not responsible!""
That's exactly what it is. I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing, always (the fantasy), because... I mean, hell, I sometimes have fantasies of being totally controlled by someone else. The idea of that happening in real life? OH FUCK NO. I'm a control freak IRL.
But, much like rape kink, it's a fantasy that appeals to a lot of people. And I think the book is successful in that, and probably I wouldn't have even written this post if not for a) the fact that so many people are using the damn book as a how-to guide for BDSM, and b) the fact that the kink community is sticking its fingers in its ears and singing "LALALALA that doesn't happen here!"
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That's exactly what it is. I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing, always (the fantasy), because... I mean, hell, I sometimes have fantasies of being totally controlled by someone else. The idea of that happening in real life? OH FUCK NO. I'm a control freak IRL.
But, much like rape kink, it's a fantasy that appeals to a lot of people. And I think the book is successful in that, and probably I wouldn't have even written this post if not for a) the fact that so many people are using the damn book as a how-to guide for BDSM, and b) the fact that the kink community is sticking its fingers in its ears and singing "LALALALA that doesn't happen here!"