Since my first relationship, I've thought about what I like about the idea of being submissive and where I draw the line. I think what creeps me out about this story is the idea that she's kind of his Galatea: he shapes her raw material and she comes to life as his creation. The one thing I took away from my bad experiences that I'm still sticking by is that my boundaries are mine, and nobody has the right to violate them if I don't want them violated. Even if the other party thinks they're silly boundaries or that I'd be better off if they were expanded. I hate like poison the idea that your partner has the right to push you into situations you don't like or aren't comfortable with because they know better. Maybe there are some people who like that and can handle it, but I know for sure that I am not one of them. That's what squicks me out about this book: the idea that he's casually planning all this stuff for her and she doesn't know.

My ex once told me he didn't love me for myself, he loved me for who I could be. I'm never doing that again.